Happy February 1st everyone! I can’t believe how fast these days have been flying by! Then again I say that pretty much every month! But seriously, how does it go by so fast?
This is the perfect dress to wear if you are planning to go out with your girls or your significant other. I am planning to wear this dress to my fashion show for my online boutique, Shop Pineapple Curls this coming weekend. You can shop it Here! It also comes in Plum. I love the velvet material, and one shoulder detail! It is a body-con style, so size up (I am wearing a large). My plan for Valentine’s Day this year is a quiet dinner at home since my boyfriend has to work into the evening, which I actually prefer. I even have a few surprises up my sleeve for him..
I haven’t really introduced Alex on my Instagram, which I soon will. Honestly, I was even scared to post our photo on there! Then I told myself, he’s my boyfriend, I shouldn’t be scared! And of course I’m happy I did, he’s for one handsome 🙂 but also just been my number one fan and supporter and has become very special to me in so many ways which I will get into later .
Long before Alex, I was with someone who I thought for sure at the time was the one for me. At my age, 28, I was ready to settle down and start a future with someone. Unfortunately, I was the only one that felt that way.
My previous relationship lasted 4 months longer than it should have and I would beat myself up for it when I finally realized what an ass he was. I held on to those extra months hoping he would realize he had someone amazing and worth fighting for. But at the same time, I also knew something wasn’t right. Your gut is always right and you should always listen to it. And because of that, I knew I had to dig the secrets and lies out beneath him because for longest time he played with my heart and my intelligence, like I was the dumb one, like everything was my fault, when in fact, he couldn’t of been more wrong.
The secrets and lies were literally laid out in front of me. Messages, credit card statements, pictures, receipts, everything. When I confronted him, he denied everything and continued to feed me lies. I wasn’t the crazy one and refused to let him make me believe I was. He just got caught. Out of respect for our relationship, I can’t and won’t go into any further detail about what transpired.
For months, after I broke up with him, thinking about that relationship made me sick. It messed me up physically, mentally and emotionally. There were days I would ask myself what I did wrong, was it me? Days I didn’t want to do anything, go anywhere . I definitely went through all the stages of grief; in denial that this could happen to me, angry that it did, depressed when I realized I allowed it, and even tried to bargain with him in an attempt to win him back. After the grieving process, it finally occurred to me; I deserve better. I even felt silly for having those previous thoughts and notions about him and us. He wasn’t worth fighting for, he wasn’t worth a single tear, and definitely didn’t deserve me. I believe I was right, because now I am with someone who has shown me their true colors and treats me with the dignity and respect I deserve.
After a few months I turned all my attention and efforts towards making myself a better, stronger, more independent woman. I did what everyone does, workout. It kept me busy and relieved stress. I focused more on my blog and opening my online store, Shop Pineapple Curls,which I did this past December. I have came a long way learning to love myself and became so much happier. Like weight lifted of my shoulders. It was the best feeling in the world.
When I was ready to date I became super cut throat . I learned that if someone told me they were too busy, then they weren’t that interested. When you’re interested in someone, you always make time. The “I didn’t have time to text back because I was too busy” is bullshit. You wouldn’t let someone you want to get to know and spend time with slip away.
Even though I went through many heartbreaks that were very hurtful, I believe it happened for a reason. It made me stronger, smarter, and overall helped me to reflect on who I am and where I want to go in my life.
With how dating is nowadays with a dozens of dating apps and social media platforms, everything and everyone is at your finger tips. Temptations are endless. I get it. It just sucks for the people who are actually wanting something meaningful. In a way, these dating apps almost make dating more difficult because of all the distrust and lies. But when you do start dating, go in with an open mind and heart. Of course be guarded. But he positive, be hopeful, be patient. You may deal with a few jerks before meeting the right person. But stick to your standards, stick to your gut.
When I met my boyfriend Alex, I was already over dating cause it was the same bullshit with every guy. But I tried really hard to go into our dates with a positive mindset. I stayed positive throughout and never had doubts with him. Of course, I was scared and guarded, but I think he knew that. He did and still does everything right. He has a crazy busy schedule, he hates texting, yet, he always makes time for me, he always texts me back and calls me. When he makes decisions he considers me and my thoughts and feelings. I would tell myself he’s too good to be true. But he also says that about me. He was patient and understanding and took his time to get to know me. I met his parents last week and his mom told me that he has told her how much he appreciates everything I do for him. Although he doesn’t expect it , or even ask for it, I still do things for him out of the kindness of my heart and to hear his mom tell me that, I know he appreciates me, loves me, cherishes, and values me, as I do for him.
No one is perfect and I understand that. You have to learn to express your feelings, compromise, and accept the person for who they are inside and out. But you have to love yourself before you can love and do that for someone else.
Love for me is patient and kind. Love is trusting the person with your heart. Love is feeling safe with the person. Love is where you feel home is. Love is when you see perfection in imperfections. Love is when their happiness is also yours. Love is accepting. Love is beautiful.
Photos by Jen Vazquez